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July 2021: Summertime Sobriety

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SLAA Summer Retreat

The Program of Recovery - It Works - It Really Does!

Friday, September 3, 2021 5:00 PM
Monday, September 6, 2021 3:00 PM

DeKoven Retreat Center

600 21st Street Racine, WI, 53403 United States

Registration is now open, register at http://www.slaachicago.org

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“Summertime and the Livin’ Is Easy”: Issues, Expectations, and Tools for Recovery

Anonymous

 

Summer is not an easy season for me for different reasons. Yes, I wait for it during the harsh winters of Chicago, idealizing the season like I’ve idealized people. And like with people I’ve fantasized over, the reality is often disappointing. Yes, the weather can be pleasant--or, recently, stifling in the heat and humidity--but I’m sometimes reminded of gratitude and acceptance for all the triggers that come up during the summer.

 

Writing has long been one of my healthier tools for getting out of bottom line behavior, so even writing this piece now reminds me of some of these aspects of summer. My birthday is in summer and there are more opportunities for social activity, but there are also more opportunities to act out and isolate--it just deceptively feels like a different kind of isolation than in winter.

 

I am a gay, disabled man who doesn’t drink or do drugs, and contrary to many people I see, I much prefer quiet time at home to partying and meeting people in bars. It’s good that I have that awareness, but of course, self-knowledge alone avails us nothing, as the AA “Big Book” reminds us, and I can get stuck in my own head when I’m at home. There I am much more prone to act out or engage in gray area activities, especially after diving deep into resentment without being aware of it.

 

With the current state of the pandemic, I have been going to in person meetings more often, and I’m hoping to be able to go to the SLAA summer retreat over Labor Day weekend. That kind of social connection is crucial, especially when it comes to recovery for staying connected and not becoming isolated. I’m enjoying getting out, but as I continue my sobriety, other addictive behaviors flare up to both celebrate different occasions and numb discomfort and pain.

 

So my summertime sobriety is admittedly nowhere near perfect. I struggle with resentments, social activity, isolation, and other issues, but even with some recent gray area activity, I’ve gained awareness of how to manage feelings and continue my sobriety. I noticed this also last summer: the expectation that I should be having a great time in summer can lead to more isolation, resentment, and potential acting out. I had a friend die and found out about it on my birthday, but gratefully, there was an SLAA fellowship event that day, so I got out of my head and got immense support. This helped me stay sober amidst such expectations. 

 

In addition, I’ve gone on a couple of dates recently and am becoming more aware of my healthier patterns: having boundaries, calling other fellows for suggestions around potential anorexia, recognizing and listening to feelings of ambivalence, and not being willing to settle for “crumbs” in terms of intimacy with people I find unattractive or unavailable. 

 

This is definite progress for me, and I’ve even gotten to a place in my life where I am okay being single and alone. The challenge is not letting that state turn into isolation from others.

 

I don’t believe God plans all events for a reason, but I’m returning to the idea from the AA Big Book that acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. For me, though, that does not mean passivity--it means actively working on accepting the things I cannot change and changing the things I can, as it says in the Serenity Prayer.

 

I can accept that the summertime is difficult for me. But today I have tools to change how I react to it. For one, because I have struggled so much with resentments, I am returning to doing mini fourth step inventories of some of the ones that have never gone away. Even when I can’t see my part in some of these situations--for example, with people who disappeared from my life without saying why--I have tools for contrary action: prayer, meditation, outreach calls, and other things that I would like to use more often.

 

So, in the season of more heat, less clothing, and seemingly more temptation, I am learning that I, too, can find greater serenity in the midst of turbulence.

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Fun and Fellowship

Chris M.

 

When I came to SLAA I was all alone and did not know what to do with myself. Everything in my life did not seem to be working. There were people in my life and I had activities but did not feel connected to anyone. I was in and out of a dead relationship that I felt no connection with and was obsessed with sex and finding my next sexual encounter. Intrigue kept me company when I had no one to act out with. I lived my life searching out that recognition and approval from women and sex, I sought approval from others with images that I would create, re-inventing myself until I felt acceptable. Of course, I never found what I was looking for. In the end it no longer nullified the loneliness I felt. I came to SLAA because I was broken. 

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Now I'm at a point where I am aware of myself, I understand that I am anorexic. I understand why I am the way I am and why I did what I did. The scary part is, it no longer works for me and there is no going back. So, now what? I've learned to live in my own skin without seeking the approval of others, the idea of committing to and/or having sex with someone I barely know sounds crazy and unrealistic to me. That's all I knew. Now, I have to learn healthy ways  to feel connected. I learned about who I am through insight I gained from other SLAA members and I can also learn to connect with others in a similar way. By having fun with other members I can practice just being part of a group and sharing activities. Something I have longed for a long time but never knew how to ask for. I've always wanted to feel like I belonged somewhere and have a place with others. I can only expect to gain as much as I have to offer any group or person. In SLAA I can learn to just be a part of.

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SLAA Summer Retreat: Save the Date
slaa-retreat-2021-art-v2.png
Summertime and the Livin' Is Easy: Anonymous
Fun and Fellowship: Chris M.
Announcements


Announcements

Thank you from Intergroup
Intergroup Positions Available
Opportunities for Newsletter Submission
GREAT FACT

Thank you from Intergroup

The Chicago-Milwaukee Intergroup would like to express gratitude to the following groups for their contributions, as reported at the July meeting:​​​

  • Hedwigs SLAA Group (5/30/21): $111.19

  • SLAA Anorexia to Healthy Relationships (5/5/21): $21.55

  • Individual Contributions (5/17/21 - 6/16/21): $27.00

These contributions help with Intergroup operations so we can continue to carry the message. Thank you!

 

 

Intergroup Bylaws Revision

The Greater Chicago/Milwaukee SLAA Intergroup's (GCMSI) bylaws are guiding principles that inform service at the Intergroup level. These bylaws are in the process of being revised, and group feedback is very important to the revision process. Contact mailroom@slaachicago.org for details on how to get your group involved.

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Intergroup Positions Available

In March, the Greater Chicago/Milwaukee SLAA Intergroup  held elections for Intergroup officer positions. If you would like to participate, we encourage you to join us on August 21st at 8 a.m. This month's meeting will be hybrid, we are meeting at NTAC (909 W Belmont) as well as on Zoom, please contact 312-725-9918 for details.

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Opportunities for Newsletter Submission

 

As members of SLAA, you have the opportunity to contribute to our local Intergroup newsletters, as well as the fellowship-wide newsletter. Read on for more information.

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Contribute to GREAT FACT

 

GREAT FACT—what you are reading at this very minute—is the newsletter for the Greater Chicago–Milwaukee Intergroup.

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We're prepping for publication for the next few months and looking for the following submissions for future issues as it pertains to your experience, strength and hope:

  • Essays

  • Fiction

  • Poetry

  • Artwork

  • Photography

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Upcoming deadlines:​​​ â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹

  • August (August 14th): “Working with Others”

To submit, please send an email to mailroom@slaachicago.org with the subject line "Newsletter Submission."  Please feel free to send us something outside of the themes above, and we’ll slot it in when appropriate. Thanks!

Intergroup Bylaws Revision
Intergroup Meeting Minutes

Greater Chicago/Milwaukee SLAA Intergroup

Meeting Minutes- Saturday, June 19, 2021

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Attendees:

Chris S, In Reach Chair, RFG

Vince R, Vice Fiduciary Chair, Summer Retreat Co-Chair, RFG

Anthony P,  Facilitation Chair, Tues KCB, RFG

Dave S, Intergroup Rep, RFG

Verne, In Reach Vice Chair, Rise and Shine

Caitlyn K, Newsletter Editor, Fall Gathering Co-Chair, Summer Retreat Co-Chair, RFG

Hannah K, Outreach Vice-Chair, RFG

Kristin S, Website Facilitator Co-Chair, Milwaukee Sat. Morning

Papa, Fiduciary Chair, RFG

Josh F, Intergroup Rep, St. Hedwig,

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READINGS

  • Prayer for a Trusted Servant

  • Traditions

  • Introductions (name, group affiliation and position)

  • Greater Chicago/Milwaukee SLAA IG Statement of Purpose

  • Review Agenda

  • 12 Concepts of Service

  • Concept 9 (Anthony) (3 minutes)

 

Caitlyn K will be speaking on Concept 10

 

OFFICER REPORTS

 

Facilitation (5 Minutes.)

  • General Report: Anthony

    • Approve Minutes (May)

    • Website Facilitation: Kristin, Christie (vice)

      • Bylaws Update and any Revision & Responses (Vince)

      • Web Facilitation

      • How To Guide and Report

 

  • ABM Agenda 2 Items for discussion below.

 

Fiduciary (5 Minutes)

  • General Treasurer Report: Papa

    • Q and A

      • Suggested to bring to groups that they resume in person donations.

  • Approve Treasury Report

    • Open (Budget, etc.) Vote 9-0-1 to approve

OutReach (5 Minutes)

  • General Report: Hannah K in lieu of Sean M

    • One speaking engagement was held.  Current requests for speakers tend to be in the middle of the afternoon during the week, which makes availability of speakers difficult (jobs, lunch hours fixed).

    • More direct outreach to other facilities.

 

Inreach General Report (15 Minutes)

  • General Report: Chris

    • Newsletter Report (Chris and Caitlyn)

      • This month’s topic is summertime sobriety.

      • Please consider becoming a contributions editor.  

    • Retreat Leaders Report: Vince, Caitlyn

      • 3 day retreat, on Labor Day weekend.  $260 per person for the retreat.  Registration is open in early July, ideally July 1.

      • Budget presented: suggestions offered but overall looks pretty good!

      • Next Steps

    • Sponsorship workshop (tabled)

      • Pending Email - next steps

    • Discussion about Fall Gathering - Caitlyn & Trevor (as available)

      • Meetings are ongoing.  Dates are almost set for the event.

      • Committee Formation- if you are interested in being on the fall gathering committee please reach out to Caitlyn.

      • Goal: presentation for the retreat. 

 

Task: update the group rep sheet.  Who is coming and who is not.  Can we invite and encourage them to attend as intergroup reps and participate?

 

  • ABM Delegate: Anthony (5 minutes)

    • Review of ABM Agenda 3

    • Add a Delegate/Observer (Election as possible)

      •  Anthony will circle back on this in the next few days.

    • Payments for Delegates This Month: Papa

    • Q and A

 

New Business (10 min.) As Possible

  • Discussion Meeting in Person/Hybrid

    • Chris S will create a survey for a new location and or time for the intergroup. 

    • One of the draws of intergroup was that it was attached to a pre-existing meeting.  This allowed people to attend a meeting.  Perhaps we piggyback onto wherever Hedwig lands?

    • Perhaps RFG could host?  After the meeting. 

    • Support for Saturday morning allows for people traveling from Milwaukee and elsewhere

    • We should consider a location near a highway or a train.

    • Adding on to the RFG Event lineup might be too much.  In addition the time for the lineup is 

    • We did do hybrid before.  Maybe we have it where we can see attendance in person.

    • tablet  - used for meeting participants to see and hear group participants.

    • NTAC may be open to the intergroup event location.  It is close to other meetings though there is no meeting directly there at that time!




 

SUGGESTED ANNOUNCEMENTS FOR MEETING REPS:

  • Review and Vote on Bylaws- please send any feedback to Vince at   steps4serenity@gmail.com

  • Submissions to newsletter - June: Fun and Fellowship - July: Summertime Sobriety.

  • Retreat!! # Day Labor Day Weekend! 9/3 - 9/6

  • Looking for Outreach Speakers (direct ask - prescreen)

  • Encourage donations to IG via Venmo (@Augustine-Fellowship)

  • Encourage Donations or Sponsoring Scholarships Retreat 2021

 

Proposed Next Meeting:

Saturday, July 17, 2021

8:00am – 9:15am

OnLine (Zoom)

In Person: Open 

Intergroup Treasury Report

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Greater Chicago/Milwaukee SLAA Intergroup
Treasury Report

06/17/21-7/16/21

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Starting Balance June 17, 2021                                                                                                                       $7,096.89

Total Intergroup Group/Individual Donations                                                                                             $138.19

Total Expenses                                                                                                                                                               $733.34

Acct. Current Balance (07/16/21) Act.                                                                                                        $6,501.74

*The full treasury report is available through your Group Intergroup Representative or by request to: mailroom@slaachicago.org.  

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West Chicago IG
SLAA Online text-only chat

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SLAA Online Text-Only Chat

 

Those who need an additional resource in their SLAA recovery are invited to SLAA Online text-only chat recovery fellowship. Find more information by visiting the SLAA website, slaaonline.org, or by emailing slaaonline@yahoo.com.

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The Journal

Contribute to West Chicago Intergroup Newsletter

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Our friends in the West Chicago Intergroup invite members to contribute to their newsletter to share their experience, strength, and hope. According to Mark K., "Writing an article for our newsletter is one way you can serve yourself and others." For more information, email pcomind@gmail.com or visit the West Chicago Intergroup website.

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Contribute to the Fellowship-Wide Newsletter: Journal

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​The Journal is SLAA’s fellowship-wide newsletter, which goes out to fellows around the world.  

 

The Journal seeks submissions for the “Question of the Day” for upcoming issues (deadline): â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹â€‹

  • September/October Issue: “People as Drugs” “Through sex, charm, emotional appeal, or persuasive in- tellect, we had used other people as ‘drugs,’ to avoid our own personal inadequacy.” S.L.A.A. Basic Text page 74. Please share your story of using people as drugs and your experience strength and hope in overcoming the desire to use people as drugs. (July 15, 2021)

Submit responses or other contributions to www.slaafws.org/journalsubmit.


To subscribe to the Journal or read the current issue, please click here.  

 

Thank you for reading!

Coming in August:  "Working with Others"

We invite you to share your experience, strength, and hope.

To submit, please send an email to mailroom@slaachicago.org with the subject line "Newsletter Submission"

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